Diet Is Spelled DIE--T

I'm going public.

I'm on a diet, and now all--3?--of you are watching.

My goal is to lose a pound each week for the next year. That will put me back into the "Healthy" range for my Body Mass Index, which is currently hovering near "Incipient Gravitational Collapse".

The book--don't I always have a book?--I'm following is "The Hacker's Diet: How To Lose Weight and Hair Through Stress and Poor Nutrition". The title is snarky, but accurate: losing weight REQUIRES that our bodies receive fewer calories than they burn, and the stress of dealing with the deficit is what burns off the fat.

In short, it's a standard calorie-counting diet, with automated tools to track progress and filter out the random noise--smoothing the curve so you can see your REAL progress, and not get upset because you ate ONE LOUSY PEANUT and gained 2 pounds.

I'll post a chart of my progress on a more-or-less weekly basis. Right now, there's nothing to see, so be patient.

I'm reducing my portions, limiting my desserts, skipping the Chinese buffet (-gulp!-), drinking more water, and eating more veggies. From my garden. Real Soon Now. Did I mention I have turnips?